Towards a feminist definition of success

brooke-lark-194253.jpgThe other day, I’ve had a really odd phone conversation with a recruiter. He was trying to convince me that I should quit my job – that I just got 6 days earlier, because it wasn’t a responsible job to have, career-wise. Fair enough, you might say, he’s a recruiter, that’s his job. But it might seem just a little bit more odd to you if I told you that the job that we were talking about was sort of a feminist dream job. No, not to his mind, apparently. But to my mind a million times better than what he was offering. I’ve never really been a massive fan of the 9-5 but, since I’m a feminist, and after I’ve had my first feminist job, I started looking at all office work as a bit of a waste of time, to be honest.

I mean, I get it, we all need to work in one form or another, and that’s why I turned to the recruitment agency in the first place – they were offering a well paid job, and at a company that didn’t particularly resemble a soulless corporate giant. I guess it could definitely be worse. But having had a taste of what a feminist job looks like, I just couldn’t imagine doing anything but.

The company trying to recruit me was a professional market research company – an area that I have been in most of my professional life and so it seemed obvious, to his mind at least, that it was the job I SHOULD have been dreaming of – a ‘proper’ career development steps, whatever that means. But I just cannot. I cannot imagine – let alone dream of – spending 40 hours each week on work that mostly just makes me miserable, because all I can think of 39/40 of those hours, most weeks, is what amazing things I would be able to do if I spent all this time doing feminist work.

I cannot help it – I am a feminist and once I had a taste of a feminist job, I didn’t feel like going back to my old life of a boring 9-5, in an office full of people that I had nothing in common with, apart from the dislike of said 9-5.

Yes, my feminist job doesn’t pay much. Fact. It is not a full-time job, and therefore it only allows me to pay my rent and basic expenses. Fact. No, it is not a perfect job – it does have its ups and downs, just like any other jobs. Fact. But the ups, in this case, include being able to save a feminist space for future generations of girls and women. And so the downs quickly fade away, if you think about the incredible impact you’re making. I don’t know many ‘proper’ career paths that give a similar sense satisfaction.

What is also true about it is that it allows me to do this tiny little thing every day that not many ‘proper’ jobs do – help bring a world that is better for women just one step closer. Even if it might only be a small step. It allows me to do what I love, what I’m really passionate about, and it gives me the flexibility to also pursue my other interests at the same time. Not many people can say that about their jobs. I consider myself lucky. Most people I know from my last office job barely had time for anything apart from work, family and shopping. That was it for them.

I can’t live like that. And I shouldn’t have to apologise for it. And yet, because we live in capitalist patriarchy, I have this guy, a stranger I must add, on the other end of the phone making me feel like I’m crazy for not wanting a ‘proper’ job, a boring 9-5 that would make me mind-numb within a short few months, if not weeks, instead of a job that I’m passionate about that also gives me the freedom I need to pursue my other dreams at the same time, like the café and my writing.

But what is really bizarre about this whole story is not where this guy was coming from in the first place – this idea that I would be better off with a career-wise job – but just how hell-bent he was on convincing me that my dreams and convictions shouldn’t really ‘cloud’ my judgement when it came to career choice… The thing is, I don’t feel clouded at all. My vision has never been so clear. I want a job that gives me a deep sense of satisfaction, rather than a lot of money and prestige in the business world. I have no desire to become a CEO of a corporation. I want to be able to do something that I love, while keeping my independence and options open.

I was forced to look for work again, as the search for a space for the feminist café took longer than expected. But should that mean that I have to get back to my old life that was not me, that made me feel like I was wasting a large proportion of my life on earth doing non-feminist work, and getting progressively more and more frustrated? I don’t think so. Not if I can avoid it!

We need a new definition of success. One that does not start in the business world and finish at FTSE 100. One that stretches beyond what is simply good for the economy, and includes that which is good for people. One that includes feminist visions of society, work and success.


Photo credit Brooke Lark

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